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It is not so simple, in order to enjoy your life; you need to have money to meet living standards and obligations. |
You never hear a dying person say: "I wish I had a chance to work longer."
It is obvious from the above statement, where your priorities should be. But it is not so simple, in order to enjoy your life; you need to have money to meet living standards and obligations. The question is: "How much money is enough?" and when do you stop and smell the roses?
This is not an easy question and will depend upon each individual's stage of life and their priorities. A person that is young and just starting a career will want to devote more time to work as it will have a greater result on their future compared to someone that is older and near retirement. I think the older you are, the more you value the quality of time and quality of life, I just hope that one realizes this before time runs out.
I recall someone saying, "You are as busy as you want to be." Meaning that you control your time and your activities and schedule. You can always say no. It may not be so simple, if it is orders from your boss, but when you find that your work conflicts too often with your lifestyle, perhaps changing jobs should be considered.
Before thinking of changing jobs for the sake of gaining ground on our "work life balance" is silly, stop and think. We need to evaluate if the mental, physical and emotional "costs" related to our job are too high. Think of three assets that we all possess, time, money, and talent. Mostly likely our job is "costing" us big in the "time" and "talent" category. Are we investing too much? Do we need to perhaps consider "diversifying" the investment of our "time" and "talent" with the goal of achieving a better work life balance? Are we working to live or living to work? If we gain the world but lose our health, happiness, and family along the way, can we truly say we've kept our "balance"?
Setting realistic priorities and objectives is a good way to keep you on track. All your priorities cannot be related to work and career, so make sure there are some goals related to personal development and just plain fun, what do you enjoy doing? Make time for these activities by using your time wisely. Having a to do list and sharing this with your partner is helpful. Those that are single will have an easier time than those with partners, which require compromise and accommodating mutual goals.
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A person that is young and just starting a career will want to devote more time to work as it will have a greater result on their future compared to someone that is older and near retirement. |
Take 60 seconds right now, grab a pen and paper or electronic device of choice and actually note a few of your most important goals. If 60 seconds are about over and you've yet to record more than one or two goals, or all your goals are related to work, perhaps you are already further from that "life work balance" than realized! After all, if you don't even know where you are going, what are the chances you will ever arrive? So please, take time routinely to think about, set and adjust your "work life balance" goals. For example, in addition to making more money or getting a promotion, do you have a goal related to daily exercise? What's a million dollars if you are sick and too feeble to enjoy it? Do you have a goal related to improving yourself as a person, such as reading something related to morals and ethics?
I recently met a new business client in Tianjin who had immigrated to Canada and returned to China for the Spring Festival. He indicated to me that his first priority was to his parents who are in their 80's and living here on their own. Since he is their only son, he feels obligated to spend at least one month each year during this important holiday with them. He has structured his life to accommodate this. His work in Canada is scheduled to allow him this time; his wife and daughter understand and do not accompany him so that he can devote this period to his parents. I admire not only the filial duty but also the dedication of his life towards this goal; and he was happy.
I think it is important that a person has something to target and know what gives satisfaction. For everyone this is different and the target changes as we change. One piece of advice is to think about what you are doing now and will it make any difference to you five or ten years from now? People have hobbies that can range from collections to learning new skills; it is better to try rather than woefully looking back and saying, "What if I had…"
The pace of the world and communication has changed dramatically in just a few decades; it is amazing to think that the cell phone and Internet was not widely used 20 years ago. Now they are a part of everyone's life and probably one of the big factors in the discussion of Life/Work balance. Prior to these two weapons of mass communication being invented, the response time of communication was days or even weeks. It was common to say: "It's in the mail." and people were used to this and planning cycles and response times were much slower. Now people expect a reply immediately, at least within the day or even hours. Most people wont bother to call someone of the office landline, opting for the cell phone or using WeiXin to see if you received their email why you haven't answered.
I am not saying that these two modern pillars or invention are evil but how we use them is the key. We should not be their slaves, but rather they should be our tools. It is pitiful to see a family or friends sitting at a restaurant table with their heads bowed and two hands in front. They are not praying, everyone is texting, surfing or emailing someone. You have also seen people with their hands under the table during a meeting doing the same. This is rude and frankly wasting others time, why not turn off all devices and focus on the meeting at hand and try to end earlier with more meaningful results.
The most absurd scene is seeing a driver in a vehicle, with a cell phone in one hand and a cigarette in the other trying to negotiate Tianjin rush hour traffic. It's illegal and more important, dangerous to your health and those around you.
In actuality, achieving a life work balance in Tianjin as an expat is possible, especially when compared with life back home. Let's try and wean ourselves from those weapons and magnets of time. Turn electronic devices off during meetings and quality time with friends and family. Don't jump every time you hear the beep of a message or the custom ring of your phone. If you replied on your own terms and at your own time, it gives you a chance to organize and think about your response. Remember, time is yours to spend if you can control it. Lastly, don't forget to get moving, health is equally if not more important than money when it comes to enjoying life and maintaining a good life work balance!
