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          Stop, you're beginning to hug me

          By Patrick Whiteley ( China Daily ) Updated: 2009-03-23 09:15:10

          Are you a compulsive hugger? Are you the type of person who reaches out with arms wide open? Do you always have the need to get physical every time when you say hello and goodbye?

          If you're nodding your head and saying yes then good for you, but don't take offence when I don't hug you back.

          Stop, you're beginning to hug me

          I'm not an indiscriminate hugger, like some folks in our diverse expat community.

          I love hugging special people on special occasions but the firm, happy handshake remains my standard greeting.

          I have a few younger American friends who insist on the hug and it gets all too weird.

          I'm always quick to position myself strategically behind a table or some other large object when they race up with their arms flapping all about.

          Like a lion tamer holding out a chair, I quickly extend my arm and repel the invader.

          I get the good old handshake happening as fast as possible.

          There is also a flock of female acquaintances who insist on kissing every single time and I hardly even know them.

          Do they want one kiss, or do they want a peck on each cheek?

          It's all too confusing and I successfully use the lion-tamer strategy with them too.

          My Chinese friends say hugging is not standard operating procedure in relationships; however, a worrying hugging trend seems to be emerging.

          One colleague was welcoming back a former Chinese work mate who had lived in Australia for several years. Outside a Beijing restaurant, the woman insisted on hugging everybody goodbye.

          "Good grief!" some exclaimed but in the spirit of promoting a harmonious society, everybody hugged it out.

          One fellow in the group felt very embarrassed by the whole affair.

          He reached out and hugged away with gritted teeth.

          I know how he feels.

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