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          Virginity still matters, but differently to Adam and Eve

          By Jeff Pan (Chinadaily.com.cn)
          Updated: 2007-03-09 15:05

          57% of Chinese men hope their fiancees are virgins, while only 35% of women prefer their husbands to first eat the forbidden fruits with them, said an online survey jointly conducted by Sina.com.cn and Beijing Star Daily.

          The survey, named 2007 truthful investigation on equality between genders, also revealed a number of other interesting finds.

          Unequal opportunities unrelated to sex discrimination 

          Female netizens list "way of living, getting same salary if doing the same job, and personal responsibility" as the top three things that they feel most equal about in China, while "job opportunity, career perspective, and promotion & bonus" are what Chinese women feel most dissatisfied about.

          Zhang Li, a female psychologist, thinks the fact that more and more Chinese women can freely choose their way of life, and woman employees are equally compensated if they do the same job indicates modern Chinese women are being more "socialized" rather than just being confined within their housework and taking care of the family.

          She said the three most unequal treatments women have suffered also reconfirm women's "socialization," because job, career, and promotion are all problems one could only encounter when interacting with people outside of the family on the career field.

          Unwise to compete with men in all walks of life

          80% of women surveyed think they have less channels to make achievements, and only 5% think the opposite. Zhang thinks men, as being more socialized, have a stronger crave for fame and money, while women have more distractions to their career like family, children, and elders.

          According to Zhang, men long for social recognition on a higher level, while women generally attach more importance on compliments from parents, approval from husband, and love from their children. These differences put women in a disadvantageous position in some careers, so it's not wise for women to try to compete with men in all fields. However, opportunities still abound for women as the service industry continues to boom, and the important thing is to find jobs that can best exert women's specialties.

          Men's plight?

          73% of the women think the most unfair thing in marriage is that they are doing most housework. Zhang thinks it's a natural reflection of women's increasing economic independence. Because men provided most of the bread and butter in ancient times and women stayed inside to take care of the housework, but today women are playing more diversified roles than just housewives.

          Nonetheless, the expectations for men have not changed much ever since, said Zhang. For instance, kids today more and more hope their fathers "may not be too nice, but have to be successful." On the contrary, even the fathers are very affectionate, but not "successful" by the established social standards, they would still have to face their children's doubts and disappointments.



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